5:26 PM, Sunday, March 29, 2009
This is your life..are you who you want to be?


Lyrics will probably be a huge part of this blog. Music sets me apart from reality..not hiding from it..but getting away for a short while. Music is like a separate world. I don't know what I would do without music, honestly.

This is Your Life- Switchfoot

Yesterday is a wrinkle on your forehead
Yesterday is a promise that you've broken
Don't close your eyes, don't close your eyes,
This is your life.
And today is all you've got now.
And today is all you'll ever have.
Don't close your eyes.

(chorus)
This is your life, are you who you want to be?
This is your life, are you who you want to be?
This is your life, is it everything that you dreamed
That it would be when the world was younger,
And you had everything to lose?


Yesterday is a kid in the corner
Yesterday is dead and over.

(chorus)

This is your life, are you who you want to be?
This is your life, are you who you want to be?


This Is Your Life - Switchfoot






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1:29 AM, Saturday, March 28, 2009
"When the dust of this world clears and I look back on my life and see in perfect light.."


This song always comes to mind when someone says how nice I am for whatever reason. It is by Ronnie Freeman.

I heard someone say the other day
They'd seen in me true love displayed
Blessed by something I had done for them
No sooner had they said these words
I found myself somehow disturbed
Uneasy as I took their compliment
Cause I know the heart inside this man
I know the truth of who I am...


The only thing that's good in me is Jesus
The only thing that's good in me is Jesus

I know me well enough to know
No matter what this life may show
The only thing that's good in me is Jesus

If you could walk the hallways of my heart
And see things as they really are
I wonder if you might be surprised
Seeing faded walls of pride and fear
Rooms I've filled with faithless tears

And corners where I've stood in compromise
But you'd see the work
His grace has done
You'd know just how far I've come

In a thousand years
When the dust of this world clears
And I look back on my life
And see in perfect light


The only thing that's good in me is Jesus
The only thing that's good in me is Jesus
I know me well enough to know
No matter what this life may show
The only thing that's good in me is Jesus

The only thing that's good in me is Jesus
The only thing that's good in me is Jesus
I know me well enough to know
No matter what this life may show
The only thing that's good in me is Jesus

I could not find this song on Imeem but here is another by him..his singing is so captivating.


Fight - Ronnie Freeman


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4:35 AM, Wednesday, March 25, 2009
"In the Midst of movement and chaos, keep stillness inside of you"-by Deepak Chopra


I hope that with this post I can look back in a few years and laugh at myself because I will then be successful in what I have chosen to do.

But as of right now..I am scared, and lost. My dad keeps asking me what I want to do with my life. I don't know. My plan was never to go graduate school but if I do choose psychology, I will have to. I am also being pushed into photography..I absolutely LOVE photography..but will I be successful with such competition? I look at people's photos over at Flickr and it makes my work mediocre. But I also realize that it all photography looked the same, there wouldn't be anything worth looking at. I want people to look at something I have done and immediately know who took it.

I never thought in my life I would say this but I miss being that emotional 14 year old girl. Remember? The 14 year old girl that complained how hard and unfair life was. At that time, my life just went on...I didn't have to make any decisions and no one asked me on a daily basis what I wanted to do- It wasn't expected of me. I stayed up all night, slept all day...went to school and got what was required done. That was it. Sounds boring but not when I am now needing to now make a decision that will ultimately affect the rest of my life. Especially with the stress that will come with trying to reach that goal.

I hope I can make the right decision.



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1:55 AM, Tuesday, March 24, 2009
This Is How Music Moves Me


Music that moves your soul gives you the image of how you love...

that image of standing on the beach while the sun sets, breeze blowing through your hair, feet in the sand...with the people you love..pure tranquility. So connected to what's important..longing to keep the moment you feel while listening to that song forever...

Or standing in the rain- Hair soaked, tears rolling down your face. The past and present engulf your soul and you love it...but hate it at the same time. You want to always feel a certain moment that at one time you could not bear. You then start crying because the exact same emotions you felt years ago come rushing back...it's okay to cry, though..Tomorrow is a new day, and you are okay.

Unfortunately, it does go away. As you keep listening to the song, that image does, too.

This has been the best way I can ever describe what goes on in my mind when a song that triggers these emotions in my head. It's like living a dream...a dream so wonderful..a dream that will one day become real..whether in this life or in Heaven.

This might not make sense...but you know when you hear a song and it makes your heart hurt and feel heavy..but you still listen because you want to remember..you want to feel. And you FEEL.



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4:32 PM, Monday, March 23, 2009
I am going to buy back memories to awaken some old qualities.







run - collective soul

Has anyone heard this song? I am sure many have considering this band was popular back in the 90's. Lately, I seem to be getting obsessed with bands that are getting pretty old. Could be the fact I never really listened to them as a child or that it's another attempt to hold onto what is left of my childhood.

Ever listen to a song that makes your heart almost feel heavy?? I can't even explain how it makes me feel but music is so beautiful.

Run

"Collective Soul"


Are these times contagious
I've never been this bored before
Is this the prize I've waited for
Now as the hours passing
There's nothing left here to mature
I long to find a messenger

Have I got a long way to run [x2]
Yeah, I run [x2]

Is there a cure among us
From this processed sanity
I weaken with each voice that sings
In this world of purchase
I'm going to buy back memories
To awaken some old qualities


Have I got a long way to run [x2]
Have I got a long way to run [x2]
Yeah, I run [x2]
Have I got a long way to run [x2]
Yeah, I run [x4]
[background:]
Have I got a long way to run [x4]


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5:12 PM, Saturday, March 21, 2009
A Form of Beautiful Expression









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9:17 PM, Friday, March 20, 2009
My Life Has Been One Big Contradiction


End of story...really.

I am currently stuck in 2 directions that are completely opposite of each other. One in which I know God does not approve of..and honestly, have I cared? Seems I haven't.

Then when I turn the radio on, his voice is loud and clear. I so much want what he so patiently wants for me but it comes to a point that when you know you haven't been honest and pure with him, it seems selfish to reach back out when you know you will end up doing what you were originally doing.. again and again and again.

I keep being told it is not about how we feel but who He is...but I think it is human nature to FEEL. Feeling is partly what helps us with decisions. I feel like He is angry with me. He is always in my thoughts during my actions and I don't choose Him after the decision has been made.

Conviction overwhelms me. It only takes 2 seconds to say something I know He would not approve of. and Eternity to get back to where I hope to be.Where I used to be.

I miss the burst of energy I would get when I would learn about Him. I couldn't live without diving into who He was everyday. It was like a way to spiritually survive. I have since then dug a whole..lit it on fire, and jumped in.

Album: My Paper Heart
Artist: Francesca Battistelli

Don’t know how it is You looked at me
And saw the person that I could be
Awakening my heart
Breaking through the dark
Suddenly Your grace

(Chorus)
Like sunlight burning at midnight
Making my life something so
Beautiful, beautiful
Mercy reaching to save me
All that I need
You are so
Beautiful, beautiful

Now there’s a joy inside I can’t contain
But even perfect days can end in rain
And though it’s pouring down
I see You through the clouds
Shining on my face

(Chorus)

I have come undone
But I have just begun
Changing by Your grace

(Chorus)



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12:08 AM, Thursday, March 19, 2009
Ripped Cornea and Peek Email Device!




This is the new device I will be getting in the mail soon. It is called a Peek. It let's you send unlimited text messages and emails for 20$/mo. Although my other phone already does this, I want to help my mom on the phone bill so when I get this I will be taking the data plan off my cell. Plus, it is super cute. A friend I know has the hook up with the company and hopefully I can get a discount on the monthly price. If not, that is okay.

Today has been really rough. I got something in my eye this afternoon that has ended up scraping my cornea. I was crying it hurt so bad which was not beneficial on the pain. Whatever was in my eye is out and I am dealing with a lot of redness and soreness. Hopefully the eye drops I bought will help. Not cool.

Spring Break seems to be going pretty fast. Although I didn't go on any kind of vacation, I know the summer will make up for that. :)
You wanna know what living life to the fullest actually is? It's waking up on a Monday morning with no complaints. It's knowing you always deserve to laugh. It's doing what feels right no matter what. It's doing what you want to, no matter how stupid you look. It's about being yourself, cause no one can tell you you're doing it wrong.


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5:07 PM, Tuesday, March 17, 2009
Grief- A Pure Expression of Love


For now, I am going to post some recent notes I made on Facebook:

----

Grief is neither a disorder nor a healing process: it is a sign of health itself, a whole and natural gesture of love. Nor must we see grief as a step towards something better. No matter how much it hurts--and it may be the greatest pain in life--grief can be an end in itself, a pure expression of love--Gerald May, M.D.

Each week in my Psychology of Grief class, I am SO much more amazed. Amazed how different grief is for everyone.

This will always stick with me

"Everyone who experiences love or who forms an attachment to another runs the risk of losing the loved person or object and suffering the consequences of loss. If so, then "to grieve is to pay ransom to love".

Everyone will experience some kind of grief when the attachment with someone ends. It is a natural, unstoppable experience. Each person's grief is unique and therefore, we can't fully give a "definition" of it. Nor can we judge others of it. Time and emotion are tied with personal experiences that result in how we grieve and cope with a loss.


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MOLLIE DUVALL

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[twenty-one yrs young, blogging on and off since 2002, loves photography, God,friends, photoshop, strawberry poptarts, designer, life.]

hi I'm mollie & in my spare time i like to draw hearts. i enjoy the simple things in life and feel i deserve the best just like everyone else. i have not found "the one" yet, but when i do, it will be worth the wait and everything i've learned so far. i have no regrets.

Feeling: The current mood of mollieduvall at www.imood.com


I have faith. Faith in our wondrous capacity for hope and good, love & trust, healing & forgiveness. Faith in the blessing of our infinite ability to wonder, pray, feel & think. I have faith. Faith in the infinite possibilities of the human spirit.- Starbucks Cup

"Don't you Judge Me. Don't you dare. One day I know I'll sit before a just God. Will you be there? Or will your false, your short sighted views hold you back from real truth? All your views leave you hostage, from love, from the real truth. Held Hostage! Don't point your finger like I'm the fake, You let me in this room-that was your first mistake. You've got nothing. It's okay. I was there once so don't point the finger like I'm the fake- you let us in and that was your last mistake. Follow Me. It might be your last "mistake" -Blame it on the Holy Rollers
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